The Neighbor by Lisa Gardner

I saw this book when I went shopping with the bestie. Only the 3 little sentences on the front cover got my attention immediately. I just had to buy this book. It’s the first one I've ever read by Lisa Gardner and I can tell you, it's not gonna be the last.

The Blurb:

This is what happened... It was a case guaranteed to spark a media feeding frenzy--a young mother, blond and pretty, disappears without a trace from her South Boston home, leaving behind her four-year-old daughter as the only witness and her handsome, secretive husband as the prime suspect. 

In the last six hours... But from the moment Detective Sergeant D. D. Warren arrives at the Joneses’ snug little bungalow, she senses something off about the picture of wholesome normality the couple worked so hard to create. On the surface, Jason and Sandra Jones are like any other hardworking young couple raising a four-year-old child. But it is just under the surface that things grew murky.

Of the world as I knew it... With the clock ticking on the life of a missing woman and the media firestorm building, Jason Jones seems more intent on destroying evidence and isolating his daughter than on searching for his “beloved” wife. Is the perfect husband trying to hide his guilt--or just trying to hide? And will the only witness to the crime be the killer’s next victim?

My thoughts:

I don’t want to tell you too much, all I can say is: 

Go, buy this book, sit down and read it. If you love thrillers, you will adore this book and I promise it won’t take you long to finish it. You will love it!

I couldn’t stop thinking about this book. It’s been in my drawer for about 2 weeks and it was almost screaming for me to read it and then last week I just couldn’t resist anymore. I didn’t care that I only just started another book; I put it aside and started to read ‘The Neigbor’.

And believe me, I didn’t want to stop anymore. The whole story is just absolutely gripping and impossible to figure out until everything is finally revealed at the end. On one page you think “Okay, it’s him! It can only be him! He killed her, I’m sure she’s dead!” then you read two more pages and suddenly you are like “No no no, that’s HIM! OMG of course! But why? And is she still alive? Where is she?”. But forget it, you won’t be able to figure it out!
I seriously couldn’t stop thinking about the story, no matter what I did my thoughts revolved around this book, all I wanted to do was finishing it and finally knowing what the heck was going on there! And that my friends, didn’t happen to me for a long, long time! This is the first book that seriously got my attention until the very end. 

Friday the 13th. “Cause this is thriller!” - Or not?!

I woke up this morning, after a really good and long sleep. Sun was shining through my window and I thought: “Hey, it’s Friday today!” Last day of work for this week, no going to bed early tonight and no getting up early tomorrow morning. I was pleased.

Until I got a tweet saying: “Friday the 13th though o_O”. And then I thought “Oh right...so?” What actually is the meaning of Friday the 13th and why are most people so scared of it? I had absolutely no idea, since for me this day is actually nothing special, so what do you do in that case? Right – Google it.

And this is what I found:

"Like many human beliefs, the fear of Friday the 13th (known as paraskevidekatriaphobia) isn't exactly grounded in scientific logic. But the really strange thing is that most of the people who believe the day is unlucky offer no explanation at all, logical or illogical. As with most superstitions, people fear Friday the 13th for its own sake, without any need for background information.”

That's exactly what I was thinking really. Humans can be stupid sometimes. They do fear this day but have no idea why. For many people Friday the 13th means bad luck on this day, for others it’s just another normal day in the calendar and some even consider the number 13 as a lucky number, means a lucky day. I can’t actually complain about a Friday the 13th. Nothing bad ever happened to me on such a day (still, knock on wood for this! ;D). I mean, you have good and bad days anyway, right? Doesn’t particularly mean you ALWAYS have bad luck on Friday 13th. You never know what the day might bring when you get out of bed in the morning, friday 13th or not. You just follow your routine and hope it's gonna be a good day for you.

But still, I find it rather interesting. So tell me about your experience with Friday 13th. Do you actually believe in it? If so, can you explain why? Did something ever happen to you on a day like this? Good or bad? Or is it also just a normal day for you? I’d love to know.

And now, let’s hope no black cat will cross your way on the streets today and Friday 13th will be nice to you.






Good luck then.

Sab x

Rainy thoughts.

As soon as it starts to rain, I get into a rather depressing mood. Not always, but most of the time. When I’m snuggled up in bed for example, with a few candles lit, a cuppa and a good book and it starts to rain, it actually calms me and makes me feel even more comfy. But right now I’m sitting in the office, with absolutely nothing to do and it just started to rain cats and dogs. This makes me think of how lonely I actually am.

“When it rains, I don’t mind being lonely, I cry right along with the sky.”

I’ve been rather positive all day, I think that’s because I had a lovely talk with the boyfriend last night about our future. So I went to work with a smile on my face today, but then I got bored, then frustrated and now rather sad. Without any reason. It started to rain; I looked out the window and suddenly felt the urge to cry.


I start to think. That’s the thing. I actually hate thinking. Thoughts are seriously bad for your health. One second you’re on top of the word, your body floated with happiness, you feel invincible. Like you’re in some kind of bubble, flying through the world. Suddenly, your mind comes up with one little negative thought...*blop*...your bubble bursts and you land on the cold and dirty ground, better known as – reality. That’s how I feel about thinking. I try to think and be as positive as possible, but when I not watch out for one tiny second, the thoughts are creeping up from behind, lay a rope around my throat and try to choke me.

No matter how much I tell myself to stay positive, no matter how many plans I make and no matter how good they are. There are always these thoughts. “How am I even gonna make this?”. “What if I’m not good enough?”. “Why can’t things be easier?”. Stuff like this. It’s driving me insane.
But that’s life. You have good days and bad days. And you have to keep going. So I have no other choice, I have to kick those thoughts right into the balls. Build a one-man army and show them who the boss is. I’m not gonna let this bring me down. Come here rain! Come in thoughts! I’m ready.

Well I hope you are all full of positive energy today, go out and share it with someone. I'll go home soon and hide under my blanket until I'm in a better mood again.

Sab

And suddenly you have to grow up...

I think there are 3 really important stages in life:

1. The I-don’t-have-to-worry-mum-and-dad-are-there stage
2. The OMG-my-parents-are-so-annoying-and-HE-broke-my-heart-I’m-gonna-die stage

And finally

3. The It’s-time-to-leave-mum-and-dad-and-grow-up-and-live-your-own-life stage

Stage 1 (0-12) Oh how easy it was. All you have to worry about is when you fall down and scratch your knee. But then mum or dad comes along and makes it okay with her “magical kiss”. All the decisions are being made for you, good or bad, you don’t have to care. Life is good, easy and you are happy.

Then comes stage 2 (13-17) and life gets harder already. You have to deal with horrible teachers, hard exams, stupid classes and even more stupid homework. You fall in love for the first time but he breaks your heart and you think you never gonna survive this. And when your parents come to you and want to talk to you, you think “It’s my own life! I can do whatever I want! I’m not a baby anymore!” And when you try to talk to them about something, they just don’t understand. And you just can’t wait to properly grow up and move out!

And then it’s the time. Stage 3 (18-30) is there, you actually have no other choice than growing up and moving out soon. And Stage 2 was NOTHING compared to this! You have to get a job, earn your own money, pay your own bills and think about where you want to be in a few years. No one is making decisions for you anymore. You are responsible for your own life now. And there’s so much pressure on you, you think you never gonna make it. You have a boyfriend now? Good. Is he the guy you want to spend the rest of your life with? Better watch out that you don’t get pregnant now tho, if you have other plans in mind. You make plans, they fail. You have to think of a plan b. You may fail again. But you have to get back up and keep going. It’s the hardest thing ever and you may reach a point (like I did now with 21) where you can’t wait to be settled down, with a husband, a house, maybe kids and a job you actually quite enjoy. But you can’t just press the fast forward button on the remote of life, can you?!

Oh how I just couldn’t wait to turn 18, how excited I was to actually be a proper grown-up. And now???

My nana always says: “When I was your age, I was already married for 3 years and had 2 kids!” – Yes nana, times have changed. What am I supposed to do with kids now?! Can you give me the time to sort my life out before I bring another life into this world?! Thank you.
But besides that, HE has to put a ring on it first. Call me old-fashioned but I want to be married before I have kids. But not yet. Maybe in 2 or 3 years. That should be enough time for the boyfriend to save money for my engagement ring, right?! And then he will get another year to save money for the wedding. Yes, I think that’s very generous of me. And then we can have kids. A boy first please, then a girl (tell this your little soldiers down there A. Thank you!).

But anyway, why am I talking about marriage and kids now?! We should talk about this “sort my life out first” part. So again, I’m 21 currently working as a secretary and still living with my parents. How awesome is my life?! I have to say my job is well paid though so it could be worse (but, I’ll admit I’m rather bad with money. Which means after about 3 weeks all my money is gone (I blame all these awesome books, beautiful heels and clothes out there, why do I have to be a bloody woman?!).)

I have this plan in mind for such a long time now. And it keeps changing and changing and changing because this plan is not easy to actually realise. It requires a lot of thinking, planning and of course money, which I’m scant of. But I have to keep going, keep planning and keep saving money as good as I can. I mean this is about my future You have to be patient, very patient. I’ve been bloody patient for the last 21 years now, I’m done. Sick of waiting! I need my plan to become reality now. But no....I’ll have to wait at least another 4 months. Thanks for that.

I mean, my life could be so easy. I could just move a few streets away from my parents and get a job in an office or something. But this would also mean I’d have to give up on my relationship as well! And since I found the man I want to marry in a few years, I would not only be utterly devastated but also a huge idiot!!! So let’s absolutely forget about this! That’s not what I want and it wouldn’t be good enough for me. Call me arrogant, but I think I can do better and I deserve better. I’ve never been really happy here, I don’t know the exact reason to be honest, but I know that if I won’t take this step, if I won’t pack my bags and just try it, I’ll never be happy. And hey, no risk, no fun right?!

“Failure is the mother of success.”

This is one of my favourite quotes right now. People fail, people make mistakes. But that’s important in life. It’s part of growing up. But most important is that you get back up again. That you tell yourself: “Right, I failed. But I can do better!” I’d rather try to make my dreams come true while I’m still young, than sit here in a few years and regret that I didn’t try it at all. So I’ll be patient, I’ll work hard and I know I’ll get there someday. It won’t be easy, there will be many obstacles in my way and yes, maybe I’ll fail, but that’s what life is about. If I want it enough, I know I can do it!

Now, what are your thoughts on this?
And what actually is growing up for you?
How do you imagine your life to be in about 5 or 10 years?

On that note, have a nice day and I hope you can fulfil some of your dreams today. X



Sab

I left my soul in London town.

Tuesday, 10th April 2012. I am back in the office after a glorious weekend in London town. And I have absolutely no idea what I am actually doing here. All I know is, I shouldn't be here. I should still be in London, or England at least. But that my friends, is another story and I am already working on the happy end. But back to my weekend now:

I finally managed to pack my bags on Thursday (which included a huge clothes-and-shoes-decision-drama, as always when I go away even for just a few days). I left the house with a 17! Kg suitcase and the bestie on Good Friday, for our little Easter holiday in London. I was rather excited. We've been at the airport quite early but that was absolutely fine. We spent some time walking about, eating ice cream and going through the duty free shop. This wasn’t a good idea, because we actually went straight into the perfume section and my nose absolutely hated me for this. But we're good again now.
After we finally got on board, I felt rather sick. I just realised again that I actually don’t like flying (People just don’t belong up there, I rather have my feet on the ground!) and my mind created the most horrible scenes while we’ve been in the air but I tried to block them out as good as I could with loud music blasting through my headphones.

But when the captain said we’re just about to approach now, I looked out of the window and as soon as I saw England, I calmed. I felt like I’m coming home after a long, long time. We got our luggage, got on the Gatwick Express to Victoria station and then took the tube to Heathrow airport. As soon as I’ve been on the tube, I was absolutely happy. We got off at Heathrow and the boyfriend was already waiting for us there. I was even happier than before. Then we got on the bus to the hotel, when we arrived there, we almost had a little break down because the woman at the reception told us our rooms weren’t paid yet (PANIC!) but we solved this problem and finally got into our rooms. I was absolutely shattered. London had to wait another day, I just wanted to sleep.

Then Saturday was finally there. The day me and the bestie have been waiting for, so incredibly long. McFLYday. We got lunch and then went straight to Hammersmith Apollo. Loads of girls have been there already, some for almost 24 hours! It was absolutely freezing! So we sat on the cold pavement and waited...and waited...and waited...for 6 bloody hours. Then it was finally time to get into the venue, after another hour of standing and waiting outside (meanwhile I absolutely regretted that I decided to wear high heels, but no pain no gain!) And then there we’ve been. 3rd row, ready to see the sexy boys from McFLY. The 2 support acts been on stage for what felt like ages but as soon as they finished and YMCA was played I was just absolutely excited and I couldn’t breathe because I knew McFLY would come on stage in a few seconds (That’s the fangirl inside of me speaking right now, I can’t help it!). And the show has been absolutely brilliant, fantastic, just perfect. My feet we’re killing me, I couldn’t breathe, it was bloody hot and I got squashed but fuck it was absolutely worth it! (Next time, I’ll take a seating ticket tho!) Unfortunately my phone decided to be a bitch and wouldn’t let me take one good picture of the boys I adore so much but I made some videos and they’re actually brilliant. So I’m rather happy right now.
After the concert was the after party but we couldn’t manage to go there, since we looked like absolute twats after the gig, we had to go back to the hotel to get showered and changed, by the time we would’ve gone to the club tho, the party would’ve been almost over so we just stayed at the hotel (which i really do not regret). And I fell asleep, with a huge smile on my face and some butterflies in my stomach. This night was just brilliant. Words cannot explain it. You have to experience this to know what I felt/feel.

On Sunday we met up with James and Vicky and walked through London, found a little Italian restaurant and sat down to have a drink. Unfortunately it was Easter Sunday so most of the shops have been closed and since the weather was terrible as well we really couldn’t think of anything to do. But it was good tho.
Later that day the Bestie decided to go to a comedy gig, I couldn’t be bothered to so I went back to Hammersmith with the boyfriend and sat down in a rather nice pub. This night I have to admit, was rather perfect. It couldn’t have been any better. We talked, kissed, laughed. And after a pint of Guinness and 3 Crabbies ginger beer, I was quite drunk. But so was the boyfriend. It was fun, fun fun. And apparently I sound prober posh when I’m drunk, according to the boyfriend. Anyway, I felt so good this night. I haven’t been this happy for ages. I just don’t know what I’d do without my boyfriend. He completes me. And I really want more nights like this, in a pub with him, having a few pints and just rambling and laughing and kissing. Nothing more, nothing less.

And then Monday came along. I hated it. I had to say goodbye...goodbye to McFLY, goodbye to English TV, goodbye to the pub in Hammersmith, goodbye to the tube, goodbye to the hotel, goodbye to London and worst of all goodbye to the boyfriend. Of course I cried like a baby and looked like a fool. But we had no other choice, he had to get his train to Sunderland and I had to get back on a plane to Germany. This weekend was absolutely amazing, but our holiday had to end and we had to face reality again.

So here we are now, back to reality. Back to in the office, back to the same shite. The same boring place. The same stupid people. But as I told you earlier, I got a plan. A plan to get away from here and I’ll do whatever the fuck I’ll have to do to make this plan become my reality.

I'll stop now. This is quite a long post. I hope someone takes the time to read this and maybe leaves a comment. I hope you had a great Easter weekend as well and your reality is better than mine right now.


Love, love, love

Sab